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Today the St. Louis Rams played the worst game in the history of the oft-horrible history, losing 38-3 to a mediocre Philadelphia Eagles team.
Watching the game on a big, HD television made the spectacle ever more frightening. The incompetence, laziness, lack of preparedness, inept game planning and powder-puff tackling seemed to delight head coach Scott Linehan, who believes winning is over-rated.
Linehan’s remarkable leadership and motivation worked magic on new offensive coordinator Al Saunders. Once the cream of the crop of up-and-coming offensive geniuses, Saunders burned his wildly successful playbook crafted with the Vermeil and Mike Martz Rams and KC Chiefs. Instead, Saunders changed the face of football offensive strategy by running plays designed to lose yardage.
Lacking talent, the Rams excelled at Saunders’s offense. Quarterback Marc Bulger is a master of negative yardage and missed opportunities, and he implemented Saunders’s “Net Negative” offensive strategy to a “T.”
The Rams defense employed a remarkable of strategy against Eagles’ QB Donovan McNabb. The strategy involved giving Eagles receivers 20-30 yard cushions while allowing Donovan unlimited time to set up and throw the ball. This strategy ensured the Rams d-backs had plenty of energy for the post-game parties. McNabb appreciated the Rams’ gentle defense, completing 21 of 33 passes for 361 yards and 3 TDs.
Next week, the Rams hope to lose by at least 60 points to defending Super Bowl champion New York Giants.
“I think losing by 50 or 60 points to a team like the Giants would be a feather in our cap,” said Linehan during the team’s post-game celebration.
Rams tickets are available throughout the St. Louis area at prices ranging from $5 to $15 for all 8 home games.