Not All Lies Are Meant To Fool
Did Tony Soprano expect people to believe he was in waste management?
No. Tony Soprano expected people realize he was a wise guy and treat him with due respect–or what you and I call fear.
Some lies are meant to make the liar seem more successful or more talented or better than he thinks he is. Trust me, I’ve done it.
Other lies are meant to get the liar out of trouble. Been there with Bill Clinton.
But the scariest liars are the ones like Tony Soprano. They don’t want to fool you. They’re not getting out of trouble. They’re saying, “I can tell you whatever the fuck I want and you can’t do shit about it because of who I am. Got that, Sparky?”
Or as Chili Palmer said in Get Shorty, “I’m the guy who’s telling you the way it is.”
When the Obama administration first announced that Lois Lerner’s hard drives ate all her email, I knew what kind of lie it was. It was a “waste management” kind of lie. It was a Tony Soprano lie.
A lot of people seemed shocked that IRS Commissar John Koskinen was so smug, arrogant, and combative at his first House hearing last week. I wasn’t. I knew the whole hard drive story wasn’t an attempt to deceive, but an attempt to belittle and intimidate. There’s nothing more demeaning than being told an obvious lie.
John Koskinen is a Capo in Barack Obama’s . . . thing. He knows nobody can lay a finger on him. Nobody. Why? Because he as an army and he knows where everybody lives. He knows how many kids they’ve got and where their wives get their nails done and where their husbands play golf.
John Koskinen knows every credit card transaction, every ATM withdrawal, and every gas station Darrell Issa pulled into at 12:45 a.m. Same goes for you, and you, and you.
I hate myself for the stupid lies I’ve told in my life. The lies intended to make me bigger made me smaller, and the ones intended to get me out of jam got me deeper into the jar. Over the years, I’ve gotten better about avoiding lies. Well, I try, anyway.
But I never used a lied as a form of intimidation. Maybe I would have if I actually had the power to destroy someone’s life. I don’t know. Happily, I’ve never had that kind of power.
But Barack Obama and John Koskinen have the power to ruin people–innocent people. They have the power to disappear people, audit people, ruin people.
And when one of Obama’s Capos says “sometimes a hard drive is just a hard drive,” they’re really saying “it’d be a shame if something bad happened to that little girl of yours.”
Stop trying to disprove the hard drive lie. No one bought it, and no one was supposed to.